McCain Music Recommendations
Thinking about John McCain’s Foo Fighters problem, some of the issue here is that not only are there few contemporary rock bands that are inclined to support McCain, but there are few contemporary rock songs that are thematically appropriate to the McCain campaign. If it were actually the case that “My Hero” is about the need to look up to a war veteran, then I’m not sure that Dave Grohl’s personal opinion would matter. This problem goes back, of course, to Ronald Reagan’s (mis)appropriation of “Born in the USA.” It’s somewhat counterintuitive, but I think conservative politicians would actually do better to turn to the world of commercial hip-hop, where key conservative values like greed and violence are frequently lauded. Consider T.I.’s “Rubber Band Man”:
Ay, who I’m is?
Rubber band man
Wild as the Taliban
9 in my right, 45 in my other hand
Who I’m is?
Call me trouble man, always in trouble, man
Worth a couple hundred grand, Chevys, all colors man
That’s the McCain message. He’s a maverick (”wild as the Taliban”), endorsed by the NRA (”9 in my right, 45 in my other hand”), understands the need to cut marginal tax rates on the most productive Americans (”worth a couple hundred grand”), and owns thirteen cars (”chevys, all colors man”). The song takes on other McCain themes as well:
Went down, did 10, back ’round and rich again
That’s why I’m young wit’ tha soul of a ole man
I’m shell shocked, get shot slow ya roll man
And, of course, TI even hits the experience issue, arguing “check my resume n—–, my record’s impeccable.”
87 Responses to “McCain Music Recommendations”
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October 9th, 2008 at 11:06 am
“Fuck the Poor” by the group Selfish Cunt, would fit the bill.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Ice Ice Baby to Go…
October 9th, 2008 at 11:12 am
Play that Funky Music, White Boy…
ha ha ha. You crack me up, Matthew.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:13 am
The Slickers Johnny Too Bad:
Walking down the road
With your pistol in your waist,
Johnny you’re too bad.
Walking down the road
With your ratchet in your waist,
Johnny you’re too bad.
You’re just robbing and you’re stabbing and you’re looting and you’re shooting
Now you’re too bad.
…
October 9th, 2008 at 11:15 am
Obviously he should use “Dancing Queen” by ABBA which helped him survive his captivity in Vietnam.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:20 am
Re “Obviously he should use “Dancing Queen” by ABBA which helped him survive his captivity in Vietnam.”
—————
I thought that was what the Gooks used to torture him.
“NOOOOooooo! Make it stop!”
October 9th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Actualy Jay-Z might the most quntissentialy Republican musician of all. Unlike the T.I.s of the world, Jay-Z doesn’t relish the violence. He portrays himself as the “reluctant warrior”. Trying to go corporate, he’s the CEO of hip-hop. But of course, he’ll respond forcefuly if threatened with violence.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:23 am
Judging by his vernacular and grammar he’s certainly not an Ivy League elite. I’m sure the folks would really appreciate that.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:24 am
can you imagine a conversation between sarah palin and T.I.? the english language would never be the same.
also, too, who i’m is?
October 9th, 2008 at 11:24 am
Let’s all pretend I know how to spell “quintessential”.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:27 am
50 cent is another good republican music source – here is his quote from 2005 about bush (reference mtv http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1514482/20051123/50_cent.jhtml?headlines=true)
50 thinks the president is “incredible … a gangsta.” “I wanna meet George Bush, just shake his hand and tell him how much of me I see in him,” 50 told GQ. If the rapper’s felony conviction didn’t prevent him from voting, 50 said he would have voted for Bush.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:31 am
Here’s a song McCain should use at his events:
“Here Comes President Kill Again” by XTC
Here comes President Kill again,
Surrounded by all of his killing men.
Telling us who, why, where and when,
President Kill wants killing again.
Hooray, ring out the bells,
King Conscience is dead.
Hooray, now back in your cells,
We’ve President Kill instead.
Here comes President Kill again.
Broadcasting from his killing den.
Dressed in pounds and dollars and yen,
President Kill wants killing again.
Hooray, hang out the flags,
Queen Caring is dead.
Hooray, we’ll stack body bags,
For President Kill instead.
Ain’t democracy wonderful?
Them Russians can’t win!
Ain’t democracy wonderful?
Lets us vote someone like that in.
Here comes President Kill again,
from pure White House to Number 10.
Taking lives with a smoking pen,
President Kill wants killing again.
Hooray, everything’s great,
Now President Kill is dead.
Hooray, I’ll bet you can’t wait,
To vote for President Kill instead…
October 9th, 2008 at 11:33 am
Matt: Aren’t Slayer songs appropriate for the McCain campaign? War Ensemble? Reign in Blood? Slayer’s songs of warfare coincides with McCain’s militarism-I think some on the net have meshed McCain and Giuliani campaign appearances with those songs. I think your boy Ackerman sometimes quotes Slayer lyrics in his blog post titles…
October 9th, 2008 at 11:41 am
Johnny & Sarah by Apes & Androids seems fitting.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:53 am
Sorry Matt, the Daily Show already beat you to this.
October 9th, 2008 at 11:55 am
Randy Newman’s Political Science:
No one likes us-I don’t know why
We may not be perfect, but heaven knows we try
But all around, even our old friends put us down
Let’s drop the big one and see what happens
We give them money-but are they grateful?
No, they’re spiteful and they’re hateful
They don’t respect us-so let’s surprise them
We’ll drop the big one and pulverize them
Asia’s crowded and Europe’s too old
Africa is far too hot
And Canada’s too cold
And South America stole our name
Let’s drop the big one
There’ll be no one left to blame us
We’ll save Australia
Don’t wanna hurt no kangaroo
We’ll build an All American amusement park there
They got surfin’, too
Boom goes London and boom Paris
More room for you and more room for me
And every city the whole world round
Will just be another American town
Oh, how peaceful it will be
We’ll set everybody free
You’ll wear a Japanese kimono
And there’ll be Italian shoes for me
They all hate us anyhow
So let’s drop the big one now
Let’s drop the big one now
October 9th, 2008 at 11:59 am
“99 Problems and a Bitch Ain’t One.”
.
October 9th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Wouldn’t the most appropriate song be “My Friends” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers?
October 9th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Or “That One” by P.O.S.
October 9th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Or any song involving Old Dirty Bastard.
October 9th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
And for Sarah Palin? How about a nice song about her Faith. By George Michael.
October 9th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Actually, I did see some where a long list of famous punk rockers and rappers who are Republicans (I’m sure a big reason is taxes).
October 9th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
i have a few more suggestions along these lines:
lil wayne’s “got money” (about having money and being “the bomb, like tick tick”); fabolous’ “tit 4 tat” (like with lobbyists!); and busta rhymes’ “don’t touch me” (to capture the sense of entitlement, indignation, and rage mccain is currently displaying and with the key quote “see i be the type to always beat you to the punch faster/ keep a smile on my face, but carry the bushmaster”).
October 9th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
If McCain is such a big Foo Fighters fan and he would like to continue to use one of their songs, I’d like to recommend “Long Road to Ruin”. That seems more appropriate for his campaign anyway.
October 9th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
As Tbogg says
You don’t need a weatherman to know that your campaign blows
Johnny’s in the basement
Mixing up the medicine
I’m on the pavement
Thinking about the government
The man in the trench coat
Badge out, laid off
Says he’s got a bad cough
Wants to get it paid off
Look out kid
It’s somethin’ you did
God knows when
But you’re doin’ it again
You better duck down the alley way
Lookin’ for a new friend
The man in the coon-skin cap
In the big pen
Wants eleven dollar bills
You only got ten
October 9th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Actualy Jay-Z might the most quntissentialy Republican musician of all.
Actually, “quntissentially” is McCain’s favored term for women who are the ne plus ultra of femininity.
October 9th, 2008 at 1:55 pm
“Or “That One” by P.O.S.”
ooh, it works on multiple levels.
October 9th, 2008 at 2:13 pm
“Cunts are stilling running the World” by Jarvis Cocker?
Works on multiple levels.
October 9th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
The Republican anthem should be 1st song on AC/DC album ‘Back in Black’. The song starts out with the tolling of a bell & included the lyrics ‘if good is on the left, then I’m sticking to the right’.
To me, that sums them up.
Hope Angus & the boys don’t get mad at me, I like AC/DC & that song actually. It’s only Republicans that I despise.
October 9th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Excellent. How about 50 Cent’s “I’m a hustler”?
Touches on the issue of McCain’s no-longer-a-maverick status, the respect for “experience”, response to being challenged, and the preference for bellicosity.
A shout-out to McCain’s tax plan!
Indeed, my friend.
October 9th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Actually, if we’re talking about 50 Cent, the obvious choice for McCain is You Not Ready.
October 9th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
McCain’s penchant for deregulation led to the mess in global financial markets. Hence Steely Dan’s Black Friday:
When Black Friday comes
I’ll stand down by the door
And catch the gray men
When they dive from the fourteenth floor
When Black Friday comes
I’ll collect everything I’m owed
And before my friends find out
I’ll be on the road
When Black Friday falls you know it’s got to be
Don’t let it fall on me
October 9th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
People (sorry I don’t have references handy) have traced a great deal of both black inner-city and rural white truculence to the Scotch-Irish disdain for outside authority, distrust of outsiders and their book learnin’, and emphasis on violence as the immediate and necessary solution to any perceived “disrespect”. Add to that the entrepreneurial expertise of at least some in the inner-city drugs business (the ones earning much more than MacDonalds wages) and you’ve got perfect Republicans.
October 9th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Actually the “45 in the other” is a reference to a 45 oz beer; which is also much more appropriate, considering the source of his fortune…
October 9th, 2008 at 5:58 pm
hah! great song pick, matt. however: i can hardly see mccain agreeing with tip’s claim in the first verse that he’s “campaignin’ to bury the hate.” furthermore, tip is adamant that he “don’t talk behind a n—- back, i say it in his face,” which would seem to run counter to mccain’s strategy of late.
October 9th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Of course, unlike McCain at the debate Tuesday shying away from bringing up Ayers, T.I. “don’t talk behind a ni____’s back, [he] say it to his face.”
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